Exploring Attachment Theory in My Practice: A Path to Healing Through Connection

As a therapist, I deeply appreciate the insights of attachment theory. Human beings are inherently relational creatures, evolved for love and supportive connections. This insight into how we’re wired offers a practical approach to working with the foundational attachment system in relationships, which is why it informs all the work I do with my clients.

Why Attachment Matters

Throughout my career, especially during my time working with elders in assisted living, I’ve observed the profound effects of a life filled with love—or the lack thereof. One of the most striking examples is how individuals with dementia display attachment behaviors rooted in early childhood experiences. Some elderly individuals, particularly those diagnosed with Alzheimer's, become anxious when their supportive individuals are not nearby, even for a short time. This anxiety often stems from a history of insecure attachment in their early lives. On the other hand, there are those who, despite cognitive decline, demonstrate calmness and the ability to self-soothe even when they are alone, showing how deeply attachment patterns are etched into our self-soothing processes.

This professional observation and experience has reinforced my understanding that attachment is more than just a psychological concept; it operates at a cellular level. EFT applies this understanding practically by addressing how attachment influences adult relationships and emotional health.

How EFT Can Support You Through Life’s Challenges

One of the core aspects of EFT is that it encourages vulnerability and fosters emotional safety, which is crucial in creating a sense of security. For instance, I worked with a client, whom I’ll call Nora, who was struggling with anxiety about her husband's declining health. As a retired woman, she found herself fearing his imminent death. We explored how her anxiety was linked to her deep love for him, and through our sessions, she was able to normalize her fear and sadness, helping her feel less shame about her emotions. The therapeutic space allowed her to express her vulnerability, Nora was able to grieve and cope with the changing of the deep bond she shared with her husband. It was a profound moment when she felt comfortable enough to cry, which she rarely did in front of others.

Attachment theory’s strength lies in offering psychoeducation that helps clients understand the nature of their emotional responses and the importance of secure attachment in all types of relationships, whether romantic, familial, or even friendships. By normalizing the anxiety that comes with loving deeply, a great therapist helps clients feel empowered, encouraging them to embrace their emotions and take proactive steps toward healing.

Integrating with Other Approaches for a Holistic Healing Experience

While a relational focus is often my preferred approach, I also get jazzed about other modalities, like narrative therapy, which is about the cognitive healing power of storytelling. I find that many clients benefit from reframing their challenges as opportunities, allowing them to take control of their narratives. I believe that while a relational lens works wonders in helping individuals reconnect emotionally, narrative therapy can help them rewrite their stories in a more empowering way.

Ready to Build Secure Emotional Connections?

If you’re looking for therapy that prioritizes emotional safety and healing, you’ve come to the right place. In my practice, I use attachment theory to help my clients foster secure, loving relationships, heal attachment wounds, and build emotional resilience. I offer private telehealth sessions for clients across California, helping you move toward a more connected, fulfilling life.

Reach out today to learn more about how I can support you through your emotional journey. Together, we can work on building the secure emotional foundation you deserve.